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Paul is going to the doctor.

Doctor, do you have something against cough?

No no problem, you can cough freely.

Why men are giving names to their penises?

Because they don’t want somebody with no name to make 98 % of their decisions.

Wife is telling to her husband.

Sweet heart, we are going to be 3.

How wonderful, I’m so happy.

Yea, mother divorced father and she’s coming to live with us.

Journalist is asking a policeman.

Do you have human profession?

Of course. I meet a guy yesterday, and broke a stone in he’s kidney in same day.

Two college students are talking.

Our professor is really stupid.

How come?

He knows 15 languages, and he can’t say a single word in front of he’s wife.

What does dentist and gynecologist got in common?

They both are saying – “Open wide”

Drunk is entering in the taxi.

At the airport please.

Well, we are at the airport.

Here is 20 $, and don’t drive that fast next time.

A woman finished talking on the phone. Her husband said:

I can’t believe you spoke only for half an hour.

It was wrong number.

A dragon lived somewhere after 7 hills, 7 mountains, 7 oceans, 7 rivers and 7 countries.

When he woke up one day he said:

Where the hell I live in.

Excited boy asking her girlfriend.

Am I the first man in your life?

Absolutely, but don’t forget that everyday my life starts again.

Two brides are talking:

You married a boxer. Are you happy with him?

It’s OK, he’s not boring.

How come?

Whenever he came home, he always looks different.

Blond is in the library. What does she looking for?

Nothing.

Hollywood star is shouting to her husband:

Hurry John, my and your kids are fighting with ours.

Doctor, doctor, so if I’m here I presume operation was successful one.

Friend, I’m not doctor, I’m St. Peter.

A husband is coming home from business trip and finds he’s wife in bed with other man.

What is he doing in your bed?

Miracles, he’s doing miracles.